These last couple days have been horrible. Fights lasting all evening, things getting ugly, terrible sleep and headaches. I'm as depressed as I've ever been. I've thought of things I shouldn't ever think of. I've begun to hate his voice when he gets drunk, whenever I hear it I just feel a surge of dread and I want to spit knives. I even hear it in my sleep sometimes... even unconscious I can't get away from it. My mom smashed the phone last night with a hammer and is waiting for an email reply back to see about getting another one. What a swell time this is.