Echoes,

Thanks for the explanation. I think I get it.

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In my case I came upon someone who was very nurturing and supportive and mirroring and encouraging. Her words immediately were intoxicating to me. She really instantly became that parent I always wished for, daydreamed about, longed for so deeply. I'm now stuck there, pulling away from relating to her this way, but still feeling the longing painfully. I need some place for it to be!

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If this is not your T, then why can't you transfer that longing to your T?

Just wondering.