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Bill3, yes that is good insight. I do tend to be nice to everyone even strangers because I don't want them to lose faith in humanity. There are many people who feel lost and alone in this world and it doesn't help when everyone they meet shuns them or gives up on them. I hate giving up on people. And I don't like to abandon someone who is asking for my help.
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When helping others, self-care is very important. Maybe there are ways that you can help others, but limit it so that you are still taking care of yourself as well.
In this situation, for example, he might consider you mean because he felt very very close at first and then felt less close, like you decided to pull away from him. Perhaps less closeness up front would have protected you from dealing with him being upset now.
And also realize that it is very difficult to help someone when you dread hearing from them. If you could better manage your boundaries, things might not get to that point and you could continue to help them while maintaining healthy boundaries.