Quote:
Originally Posted by Petra5ed
No he's never explicitly said he doesn't love me, that's kind of what I meant by not having experienced the ultimate rejection, because I can still pretend he does if I want... Although like I said I don't think he does, a few months ago he wrote me a check and misspelled my name for example, like badly misspelled.
I don't want to scare you but I've been seeing him for two years and only recently started feeling like I'm letting go. I've always been too scared to ask him if he's attracted to me or in love with me, but I hope to get the guts to ask before I leave. It will crush me to know he's not, which I'm fairly sure is the case, but it also fuels the fire to keep the mystery alive.
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Ok, I know what you mean about being scared to ask. Either answer is problematic -- if the answer is yes how do you possibly put that aside and do therapy, and if it's no then you are crushed as you say, and as happened to me.
Do you mean letting go of the feelings of needing him, or of needing to know his feelings?
I can say that once I asked and heard the answer, things were never the same, and she pushed for termination not long after, because she could see I was not doing well. But I later asked for reconsideration as the termination was itself traumatic. We went for 6 months. I would like to have had the chance to go longer, as you have, but looks like the door is shut. But for me to not know was too much of a torment.