Hi Echoes... I enjoyed reading your post yesterday and I am sorry I did not respond then. I have been a little in and out here lately.

I have thought of journaling and I used to all the time. I have thought about it alot lately... while working through anxiety and perhaps some barriers. I have been making a list... mainly of single words that I will elaborate on. I have so many things to share I am afraid that those things might be a barrier... or a defense... hummmmm... But it is all important... but maybe a defense.

I think it is good to journal or lately just write some important things down after session. I need to get a new journal I think.

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if I uncover something then I can no longer continue in ignorance...something will be required of me. What?! Fear again.

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Yes I understand... wish I was not so anxiety ridden. How to reach goals while going through the fear and anxiety. Yikes

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that so many things I might talk about seem to point to my longing to be loved and I don't want that known, seen. It seems better to let it continue to be a gut-wrenching longing than to find out it will never be fulfilled, my Fear.

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I have this fear too but this is also interwoven in to the previous quote of yours... that involves fear and for me needing to DO something. Double yikes. I do not mind telling my pdoc and have. However HE still will not tell me that he likes me.. no matter how many times I ask. I know it is therapeutically relavent... like I should like myself without his input so need of his love/admiration. Still working that through. Drives me silly though.