Hello. I'm new to this site and a little shy about posting, but here it goes.

I received a diagnosis of bipolar type 2 seven years ago. I never cared because my main problem was depression, and I looked at it in a positive way because I had nice weeks of productive hypomania.

However, at the end of january I had a mania induced psychotic break, which led to a suicide attempt and five day involuntary hospital stay (because of my psychosis I didn't see myself as suicidal. I wasn't depressed. I felt I was dreaming, was building up positive energy, and thought my way of waking up was to take some pills, and when I woke up my positive energy would be released and all negativity in the world would be erased, and that I would pretty much save the world). During my psychosis I also experienced hallucinations, like seeing words spelled backwards, like you would in dreams, etc. There was more, but it doesn't matter right now I guess.

Anyway, terrifying experience. And now I just feel so angry! I'm angry about having this disorder. I'm angry about our enormous medical debt now. Bipolar has become very real to me now. I've been frantically trying to figure out how I can have it. There is no family history I am aware of, and I know it's normally hereditary, so how can I have it?! Can you have it with no family history? I'm just mad at the world right now! How can I have this? NO ONE in my family does! Depression and anxiety yes, but no bipolar.

Anyone on here have it with no family history? The inpatient doctor, after reviewing my seven year history since being diagnosed, said I have it, but how?! My old doctor retired, and the new one I'm seeing said she doesn't know if I have it or not. My husband said who cares about the label, just as long as the treatment for it is helping me. Ugh! How can I have this?!