Mental illness doesn't exist in my family either. No one talks about it, even if it clearly does (not bipolar, just depression). Also, medication is evil, so I get a lot of grief for being on it. My sister abuses alcohol. Apparently alcohol abuse is better than medication?

Honestly, totally fine with diagnosis until january experience. I feel traumatized from it. I've never experienced anything so awful. I've never completely lost touch with reality like that. Even after I got out of the hospital I wasn't one hundred percent back to normal and ended up taking two weeks off from work.

It came out of no where. I hadn't had any episodes since a really bad depression episode two years ago that lasted three months.

I've been getting enough sleep. I take seroquel now in addition to lamictal (before I was just fine on my 300mg of lamictal). I also take clonazepam, and alprazolam, but the alprazolam is prn.

I'd been inpatient twice before the january experience, but both of those were voluntary (first one was because I was rapid cycling and completely unstable, and the second was because I was depressed and suicidal).

Just mad at the world about this right now!

But, at least I'm not the only one with no family history to have it. Not that I want anyone to have it of course.

Thanks for the responses.