You definitely do count! It's why I'm still writing. I know you all care. As my T said, actions speak louder than words. None of you have to reply. None of you have to read what I write. But you choose to. And I keep coming back here because it is helping so much. And at night, even though everyone is asleep, at least I have an outlet on here. At least I have someone to talk to. I may not get a reply right away, but any reply is better than no reply. And everyone's reply has helped me so so much. Just to know that I'm thought about... It also makes me accountable. I can't just disappear. I do not ever want to hurt anyone, so if I disappeared, I would leave you all wondering and worrying. I know I need to get to the point where I can fight completely on my behalf, but for now, I'm using you all as one of my reasons to fight