My son was just in here telling me how he wants a better amp for his next birthday. And then almost immediately after telling me how much they cost he says "Don't start crying now saying that what you bought me in the past wasn't good enough." I was like, what did I say? He said "well that's what you have done in the past." I said I know, but I'm not doing that now, am I? He said "No and that's good." Ugh. What else do I even say to that? I know I used to be a depressed mess. I wish it hadn't affected him as much as it did. I am now practicing letting myself feel what I feel briefly but without wallowing in it, forgiving myself because I have worked SO hard to overcome the issues I have worked through, and letting the feelings go. He is a really good kid, and I hope he knows how much I love him.