Hi ThisWayOut, I know that you can hear that it wasn't your fault hundreds.......of times but it isn't always going to really resonate with that part of you that keeps on telling you otherwise
Still.........I am going to add to all those times and say..........it wasn't your fault!!!!
Perhaps keep trying to remember what you'd say to someone else in your position, how you'd feel towards them........because I'm sure you wouldn't blame them would you??!!! And maybe feel compassion towards them???
Now that compassion, you deserve!!!!
And you know, none of us look on you as if you should be ashamed.........as said it should be the abuser who should be ashamed not you.

Alison