I'm discouraged I had two job interviews this week and the first one was for a hostess position at a very high class restaurant and I didn't get the job bc I didn't have experience and never ate at that place before but they were hiring my mom told me to apply and she would watch the baby while I got out of the house for a while and made some money to have on my own and help with income and just have money to do stuff for myself and son bc after bills paid we don't have much to go on.. Then I thought can he see through me...? I mean I know I'm capable of doing the job epesially when I'm manic and can do so much at once and talk to people but what about that depressive side of me you know and I haven't been too stable lately I mean I've been okay but I never know when an episode is gonna happen what if I start my job and something triggers it or something idk now I'm wondering if I even should try and get a job I'm already unstable as it is when I have my depressive episode idk I was so happy and excited and thought I would get the job now I'm just like I am so sucky why wouldn't he just let me try it out I know I could do it now part of me feels so discouraged like why even try anymore with it maybe I'll just be a stay at home mom and that's it... My husband doesn't want me to get a job anyway bc he wants me to always be with our son.. Seems like he wants to control me and keep me in box.. Bc when I said I had an interview he was like you don't need a job why do you want one I know what your doing and said are you cheating on me idk he is being werid I feel like he wants to control me and make all the money and have it and just be controlling everything idk I just think man I'm bipolar should I even start a job? What If I do have to like quit or get so fatigued and out of it idk what do yall think about being bipolar and having a job ? Do yall have a job does your other make the money ? Do you have problems at work idk like I want to believe I'm reliable and dependable and part of me does but then I'm like dude what I'm I get bipolar depressive and can't get out of bed then what they want someone there not calling in gah idk