Hello
I'm posting this thread to find a solution to this issue that I have found recently, am 25 year old, I always felt awkward with a strange size of my posterior, which cased me a lot of trouble in my childhood, but I always thought that it was normal since I was really fat and I lost my fat gradually but with left-overs.

During my life, I had never been said to be an effeminate, I had some effeminate friends to which I could easily compare my self to.

However, am strangely careful and nice to other people, I was always to giving people caring about them, maybe because my mother is such a kind person that I really don't think a human being could be so ever. My father in the other hand was rude and I was always dealing with him with a huge respect with fear since he had a really tough childhood.

But, am completely different from the majority of my surrounding, I don't like to be helped, and I ask rarely for help because I have a very strong Self-esteem. I like mathematics and am good at it ! I have a taste of a pro masculine, I like black color, I watch football and other sports, I played also, and I had also the right masculine choices, video games, anime, action and comedy movies, and I don't like shopping... I'm completely straight I love women. I respect women but I feel always shy in front of them, but its because also of my religious background.

The trigger was that recently, I sort of haired my classmates laughing, it was strange because I could not figure out why, I asked some friends but they did strangely deny anything awkward. day after day I felt completely surrounded with theses voices, and figured out that it was because of some characteristics that I have, and it was brought by a teacher's joke will I was outside of the classe. my bad body shape, my awkward standing, my talking and also my caring to everybody mad me in a inappropriate situations that I could not escape anymore. I began to be paranoyed by this, shamed and devastated, I may have encountered some mysterious laugh in my life about my compartments, but this time this was away from ending, since this time am in a new group of classmates.

Please I could bearly sleep, I could not get rid of this idea from my mind. what should I do?