I was seeking psychiatric help and never got a proper one. I tried medicines but none of them had any effect on me. I was being diagnosed for depression, anxiety and previously had OCD and self-harm/suicidal state.

Recently due to certain events, some therapist said that I may have Narcissistic Personality. And I never came to that conclusion.

1. I never thought that I was special. Although, whether its personal life or professional I usually end up fighting with people coz I get no respect or people didnt include me in a project when I deserved to.

2. I also blamed psychiatrists/psychologists (I still think Im right in some ways) for there improper management of patients and/or the session itself.

3. I never was stimulated by any woman so much so that I chase after her and/or hope for a date and actually go through it.

4. In past 2 yrs, this is my third job. I blamed the mgmt and the team members (rightfully so). They never included me in any project work and when I tried they ran away or made some excuse so that they can keep their assignments and regular work to themselves while I struggled sitting alone. I never completed any appraisal cycle coz I presumed that since I havent done much work in the year what will the mgmt appraise me for. I talked to the mgmt and they just make me handle those situations.

5. My blood boils bcoz of inefficiency of people, the govt etc. I have very strong opinions and likes/dislikes.

Am I a narcissist? Its said that some narcissists do make great leaders. What can I do to turn this hostile nature into a leadership quality?