Ah, well it sound like you still have right thoughts, by weighing out this and that. Some people just go right to it without asking if and or but. Using it as a staple rather than a learning tool.

My family did as well (I hope MI is mental illeness, my mother was schizophrenic), also we were neglacted and told to take care of eachother, which only brought on us bossing each other around. When my mother and father we home they just fought eachother. I still struggle with thoughts and an angry chatter box. Like today I wanted a lady to confront me for walking in her grass so I could tell her off.

I sounds like you see it, feel it, and know it. That takes a clear mind.

So what are you doing in your life that you like?