Awww hun, everybody does at first. Nobody wants official notice that they are mentally ill. It took me awhile to come into full acceptance. Even today I get a thought of denial every now and then even though it's obvious that I am. The best thing that you can do now is goto therapy, hang out on this forum, research the illness, make friends here, ask questions, and learn about the meds. After awhile when it makes sense, you'll get it.

The people that I was depicting are those that fell from high positions, got treatment, got better, but then floundered and became a recluse because they seem to be disappointed in life and themselves, or for the shame of what they became, or what I don't know. I'm just curios as to what does that too a person.

But you dear, this is an opportunity to make your life better than what it was a couple weeks ago because now you are being treated. There is hope for you now. I didn't get diagnosed till 43, and I wouldn't wish my life on my worst enemy. You have an opportunity to a much better life from here on. Me 2.