Hey there,

I agree with your doctor that the unresolved childhood emotions that were never worked through are partially to blame for how you reacted. It causes you to have the wave of emotions knock you off balance when something suddenly happens.

It was triggered by the shock of bird you love being suddenly in danger.

Because you didn't learn to have safe emotions happen in normal succession as a child, instead you learned to bottle them up, when this happened to the bird, it uncapped all emotions and you were over-whelmed and thrown into a hyper-state.

Personally, I think you shouldn't worry what other people want (like your dad). I think you should be counseled to learn how to have and allow emotions healthily. If all you are going to do when you see someone is pretend and act. Then you shouldn't see them at all. Because you will continue to practice the wrong way to feel.

Because pretending can become the norm, and emotional suppression becomes so common that you can lose who you are.

Also, when something does occur like the bird, the emotions no longer stay contained and you saw personally how crazy that can be.

Learning how to pretend to act is dangerous. And you have been very well trained. Listen to your doctor.

I think you should research EMDR therapy and mention it to your Doctor. I further think that you should research Borderline Personality Disorder.