This is a tough one!

My partner and I both have bouts of depression. I mean debilitating depression and recently my partner was making me feeling like he checked out of "us" and i found myself asking questions much like your husband.

I suggest seeing a couples therapist so that this person can help HIM understand what your limitations are when you are cycling. Perhaps on the flip, a therapist can help you understand what feelings your moods stir up in your partner. At the very least you two can walk out of a session and understand each other a tad bit better.

My partner was depressed and refused to talk to me. He wouldn't respond to my emails, texts, or requests to talk. He would self medicate and did this for two months. He would often snap at me and did not want to spend an excess of 10 minutes talking to me so I felt he was on his way out of our relationship and just didn't know how to tell me.

I regret needing reassurance from him while he was depressed and clearly hurting but his behavior was hurtful to me and our relationship and when that is the case a little open communication would have worked wonders for us, even bringing us closer.

What ended up happening is he got annoyed with me and I became resentful. Had we just sat down and talked about the fact that he was feeling very down and ached with depression and sometimes wasn't able to get out of bed and that it had nothing to do with me I could have been there for him to be a support not an additional threat to his well being.

You two are a team - fight together and before you can fight you have to at least talk...