Anyone else as socially isolated as I am?

I have such a hard time being around anyone that I don't know. I'm constantly feeling like I'm being judged by everyone. Sometimes if I'm out in public I will get frightened by a random stranger for no reason. I prefer to be home because anything else is just too stimulating and overwhelming. I can't even tolerate my radio playing in my car. My social anxieties are completely debilitating to me.

What are your delusions?

I seem to constantly believe and question everyone and their intentions. I'm obsessed with thinking that my loved ones hate me and are plotting against me or just wanting to leave me. I also think that I'm always the subject of their gossip. It doesn't seem like I'm just imaging this. I always think that people are thinking something negative about when I'm having a conversation with them. Occasionally, I will see something on TV and will think that it is spiritual message somehow meant for me to hear.

Hearing things? I really don't hear voices but I will hear a quick sound bite of music or hear my kitchen timer going off for just a couple of seconds when it isn't. It's never very long and usually faint but I hear it.

Prognosis?

I feel like I was fine when I was 19 and that I only continue to get worse as I get older (I'm 34). I was in college and held jobs....the past 3 years have been my worst so am I going to decline? Feeling pretty defeated.

Sorry for the lack of structure. I've never been a part of anything like this and I'm shy but I need answers and I don't want to feel like I'm the only one in the world dealing with these thoughts. Any feedback is great! I'm hoping to gain a better understanding of myself by what others feel and think. What are your struggles with this illness?