To say this is a positive topic would be a understatement altho its negativity brings light on just what I hate about this world I've created for myself and the world I've been forced upon living in.

I'm 17, wow I've said that line a million times. I know I'm somewhat repetitive but to say everyone has read my posts is like me saying I've read every harry potter book. Lately, or....the past 10-12 years I've taken a gift, and burnt it in the grown.

I have a "gift" if you will that makes me feel the emotions of everyone, I sense all the pain, the hurt, the love, the happiness, the guilt, the anger, every emotion humans can feel all in my little mind alone. When I say alone I don't mean it to sound literal, because no ones truly alone, but yet if we don't have some one to fully understand us in the way it makes us feel "there" then its as if we are really alone.

I've noticed alot lately as I've started to get out that the mental health field, diagonses,the concept of depression is all taken jokingly. I'll give examples. My friends sister is going in to psycology and describes it as "working with crazy people", and is "afraid" in some ways...this is not half the truth at all I lost respect for her when I heard it, maybe she'll change when she see's it then again....

I was talkling with a friend last night she's 21, and asked me what I plan on doing when I start college, I said " I'm going into psycology, she said lol, I think I'm bipolar, then quickly laughed it off making it seem like a joke and that bipolar is strictly when you sit there peaceful one minute then the next jump up angerly and beat up someone. My last example that really stuck out is the way the media reports it.

We've all heard (unfortunatly) about Lindsay Lohan/Paris Hilton having "mental" instability......i find it hilarous because their only problem to me is a sure case of slutacitis aka being attention seekers wanting to get laid. Pardon the pun but I'm sick of it because the media acts as if mental health is so cruel so ugly, and most of all it makes us look crazy.......

I'm apparently babbling and I'm very self conconious I pray that you guys /gals dont get offended by my rants, personally I'm scared to death.

I wish I could grab all the ppl, all the ppl who for 1 sec made me smile, and bring them into my life..most where just strangers saying hello, or like that girl at the DMV......she was so real........but I was fake.......in a real world.

PC is a great place for anyone to come and rant, talk, give love, support, retreive friendship, care and all that was given too. Thanks........pray for yourself.....I feel as if I'm living everyones life daily......I've got so many problems.....I'm like a superhero who can feel the emotions of those he see's, even those he doenst knows name.......it hurts so bad..........

Dustin