I feel for you I really do. But you have messed with your Meds so much no wonder it's been a terrible experience for you. You need to take them as prescribed and give them a good go, I have never seen you take meds consistently and as prescribed on my time on this forum. Some need up to 3 months to work especially when you've been so unstable for so long. Stability will be foreign to you. It may feel flattening at first but working with your skills you can find a happy baseline on meds. It doesn't help that you move all the time either, that is hard for mentally well people and hard on your son although you may not see that. I wish I could help you but that is up to you and your docs. My recommendation is to stay med complient at least a few months then reassess your life. All the best.