Sounds like a multifaceted array of factors. Sounds like though aware of the effect of childhood, it lingers. Sounds like the recent surgery has caused a blow to self valuation, in the sense that there's concern if not working with your degree, marital prospects are nil. Which in turn creates a fixation on an ideal.
Do you participate in any social groups where there's a larger pool of people to meet and interact with, so there's less chance to zone in on just one person, until such time you meet that special someone?

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