Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel
Yeah. I'm definitely going to write a letter. I'm not going to decide whether to send it or not till later. I will want my fiance's input, maybe my new T's input, and PC's input  And even then I may not send it. Knowing me, I probably will. I was thinking of writing (snail mail) anyways...just not this soon. I was thinking maybe a year from now. But it makes sense to write it now to help the healing process.
I have confronted people in the past who have hurt me. I've also tried contacting people who I have hurt. The 2 I contacted who hurt me was my mom and mentor from church. It really helped me. I also wrote a letter to a vet who basically caused my dogs death because he neglected signs of kidney problems and blamed us for lack of training. I didn't mail that one. I forget why I didn't, but I thought about it for a long time and choose not to.
My only fear is that my T told me not to contact her again. But if it's for therapeutic reasons, then I sort of have a right to? I know if she was my T and this happened with someone else, she would want me to. Actually, she'd want me to call  I think calling her would be inappropriate though. And I'd be a blubbering mess and won't be able to communicate clearly.
So I am going to write. Thank you for the encouragement! |
If you make it clear to your T that you don't expect or want a response, that may help. Most T's would be okay with it if they know that all they have to do is look at it. Also, perhaps see if your new T would be willing to send it to her on your behalf, as my second T did for me??? If you choose to do so, that is.
This second T of mine was a colleague of my first one, at the time she left they had been working together for some time... the address was not given to me, she sent it on my behalf, however I know where my first T is now & could write her now on my own if I wanted to because she told me where she was going before she left... I will eventually send her an update on how I'm doing now & how the work went that she was supposed to do with me & such things, but she really appreciated the one I sent & was raving to my second T about how well I write & how much I wrote! She heard me, I got everything out, I'm satisfied! It's not so ideal, in a perfect world she'd be able to respond, but I'd rather her hear me at least than have nothing at all.
That kind of thing isn't for everybody, but if you're a letter writing person & have the patience to sit with it & work on it & especially since you express yourself so well in writing in particular, I think it would help you!
One of the reasons I keep posting to you on your threads is because I know what you're going through, on some other level, you're going through where I was a mere few months ago & I can relate so much to your situation now dealing with the loss & transitioning out of it! I guess I should stop yapping now, just know I hear you & I truly understand where you're at right now!