I lost my Dad nearly three years ago when I was only 20. He had been ill for years, so I watched him dying my whole life which was very painful, difficult, and traumatic. My Dad and I were very close. Life without him is not the same and it never will be. I love my Dad dearly, but I feel angry at him. I'm angry that he did not stop smoking before he developed severe emphysema and ended up on oxygen 24/7. I am not posting this to get pity. I just needed to get it out there.