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I've been what my pdoc called 'balanced' on my meds for a couple of years now, although I'm not sure I agree. I find it hard to do anything. I think I'm balanced on the side of depression -- it is amazingly hard to do basic things like bathe daily, brush my teeth, clean my house UNLESS there is a specific purpose or place to go or a person is coming to the apartment (hubby works and I am on disability).
I mean, do I settle for this sort of blah existence? Are pdocs so afraid of mania that they put us into this kind of emotional place, or am I just lazy? I mean, bills get paid, dogs get fed, but I just exist.... even the computer doesn't thrill me anymore. On the other hand, I have panic attacks when I go out to run errands and it's really difficult to be social.
Does this make sense to anyone? Have you been where I am -- not exactly depressed, not exactly NOT depressed? What did you do?
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