I was hospitalized in January for SUI, but I wasn't SIing then. We had no agreement about telling outside sources and I told her about it, she didn't find out by herself. I shouldn't have assumed that she would be like my old T with SI.

The biggest reason why she is worried is because my old T didn't tell my mom about anything. (how it should be) But when I started having serious Suicidal thoughts, she waited too long to tell my mom and that caused me to be hospitalized. So now my new T wants to keep my mom in the loop about what's going on with me, but she realized she can't now that I'm an adult. I'm scared that her supervisor will make an exception with me and that can't happen. I've been SIing for 7 years and I haven't been "caught" caught. This is really rioting up my anxiety and making me feel terrible. I don't see her again until Thursday of next week... And there may be the dreaded phone call before then. Ughhh....

Personally this is my worst episode yet, but she didn't ask to see them so she doesn't know that. I told her that I have upgraded my tool to something a little more dangerous but as long as she didn't see them she can't tell how bad they are.