i agree with mouse. look, i know it's rough in life. i had it rough, too. i was borf deaf and half blind with a heart defect that had to be corrected in a risky surgery when i was 6 months old, or i wouldn't survived. i was sexually assaulted by my dad when i was only 2 and a half. my dad never paid a time to my mom to raise a special needs child (me). i fell into a dark world of depression when i was 20 and spent over 2 years trying to find the right treatment. had to go through people who didn't understand a deaf person with depression. i had a stroke when i was only 33 a year and a half ago. i've fighting to stay afloat in the dark world of depression ever since the stroke altered my brain that ruined my medication's effectiveness. i'm still trying to find the right treatment for my depression. i'm not trying to play victim here, but yeah, i went through hell. but, i'm still trying to move on. my depression keeps me from doing that, but i'm doing the best i can do day by day. there are days when i can't get out of bed, but at least, i'm moving forward - even if it's only a crawl sometimes. if my life somehow makes you feel any better, i don't mind, really. doesn't change how i feel about myself because i know my life contains good parts. it's an art of making the good parts important, so they don't get overshadowed by the dark side of life. yeah, i've lost people, too, so i know the pain of loss. hope i'm making sense.