I have been read the riot act by everyone I had asked to help me. I get told what I need to do - beginning with get over it.

I knew that I was in a very bad place with my BPD. I tried to explain what BPD is to my family but they weren't interested so they just ignored me - out of sight out of mind.

Feeling abandoned, I acted out and said mean things which I am not proud of. The things I said were my reaction to their silence and abandonment.

Being mentally ill is the only illness where the sick are commanded to fix themselves - they get no sympathy, no understanding and frankly I am fed the **** up.

Being emotionally abandoned by a child I find there is no end to it. I'm angry that I'm supposed to deal with being abused mentally and physically - I'm not allowed to have any fallout or negative feelings.

I'm supposed to take it all on the chin and smile and say thank you when people abandon me.

Things go from bad to worse and i realize that my lot in life is to ALWAYS BE BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING.