has your t talked to you about the possibility for dissociative identity disorder because that very much sounds like you had a little, a child alter come out. it happens to me many times in therapy, mostly a six year old and a 16 year old that is suicidal and hates living. they come out and talk to my therapist all the time. it is very important to have a therapist who specializes in trauma and dissociative disorders to get proper treatment. i spent three years with a doc that said it was going on and did nothing to treat it or my ptsd and it only managed to increase my anxiety so much i could barely function. now working with a specialist and letting these parts of me talk i am finally putting together to pieces of my past and feeling safer in life.