I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this or not. I've always felt a strange feeling of being alone and immediatly depressed when I see a group of people hanging out in public, working out together, or in online pictures. It doesn't take much for me to be happy then very sad and bitter.

This has only gotten worse once I graduated from college recently. Now I avoid going out at all, my dream job that I was supposed to have fell through and I've been stuck in this perpetual feeling of being a loser. It has come to the point I avoid going to any family parties, dinners, etc. I just stay at home. When I'm at home I feel alone, but when I'm in public I feel lonely and sad.

I grew up being severely bullied, and have always had a terrible outlook on myself about my image and have forced myself to be thin. I am currently seeking to get rhinoplasty too. My nose is not bad, but I always find myself worrying about it when I am in public. It is only worse when I see a group of jock type guys hanging out. I feel much worse about myself from being unattractive and alone.

I don't think I'm ugly, but I'm not handsome. I'm 22 and look 14. There are no defined facial features or anything. I'm also very short and it's impossible for me to gain any muscle even after spending money on personal trainers.

I hate living like this, I want to feel good, but I cant. I don't know what will make me happy.