I come from a family with a history of MI. So in this generation I and my brother have been diagnosed with BP II. There are more, but to keep it simple, I`ll tell you about my brother. The reason I am doing this is to show you how different this diagnose can play out for different people. The first time he came down with major depression was when he was 20. He had studied to be an electritian, and now he wanted to go to engineering school. He moved, got a student loan, started his studies, end everything seemed to be going well for him. But then he went into a rapid downward spiral. I wont go into the details (and some of them I probably dont know either), but he was unable to do ANYTHING but play video-games and occationally hang out with a coulpe of friends. He moved back home also. This went on for a couple of years. No meds, no diagnosis, he had no interest in seeking help. Eventually he got better, but after that he never went back to college. He was in his early twenties, had an education, and he was able to land a job in a ship-yard. Eventually he found work more in line with his education, and today he is sucsessfully working for a company making and installing maritime electrical devices. Among other things. He had to travel a lot in his job, to all different places in the world, Dubai, Rio, etc, wherever there was a shipyard and a port. And none of these trips were sceduled, it was responses to acute problems arising with a ship. In the end all the unsceduled traveling, brought on terrible anxiety-attacs and he went into a couple of years where he was hangig on to his job and his girlfriend and his kid by a mere thread. He was about to lose all of it. Finally, he had a manic episode that was really insane, and that was he was diagnosed. I think he was about 35 or 36 years old then. He was put on meds and pretty soon he started to get better. Today he is working, but hardly does any of the long-distance traveling, makes a good living, has a good relationship with his girlfriend and is a great dad to his kid. He takes his meds and takes good care of himself. So his is a story of success in many ways. He never really gave up, and neither did the people around him. So just because everything looks really dark for you now, just know that my brother was going through a lot of the same things as you are, and he still managed to get through it and has a good life today. I hope this is an inspirational story for you. There is always hope for a better future.