I could have written part of your post. Not only have I figured out all my unmet needs, my T can't give them either. And I don't think I need them from friends. My needs have been to feel like someone is always there for me, cares for me, will tell me I'll be ok, etc. I'm happily married and have supportive friends but I seem to want this from a motherly figure. But when it's been offered, I put up a wall. My T thinks I fear that if I'm vulnerable, I'll lose this person so I don't allow it. It's so weird to reject the one thing you want so badly.

I also remember cringing when my T asked me what my needs are. "Need" was a 4 letter word for me. Have you read Running On Empty or the Emotionally Distant Mother? They were very eye opening for me. My parents also loved me but were not emotionally available and then my mom had drug and alcohol issues. I had absolutely no clue how it affected me until I entered therapy after my moms death.