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I was just chatting with my "normal" husband...He just trusts.

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Mouse,
My husband is the same way. I think the trust issue is one that can become particularly problematic for very early childhood abuse/abandonment/attachment issues?....just a thought, becaue it's such an issue for me as well.

I was reminded of a conversation I had with T early on in my therapy, when we were discussing my vulnerabilities. We were going back and forth and I said i didn't like revealing my vulnerable self, because if I did then I would have to trust him, and he replied, "bingo!"

So, the trust runs both ways and takes time to evolve and ebbs and flows. It's not static. Although, I have found that the deeper our relationship gets, more and more I trust T in a different way. It has become so much more than admitting my vulnerability. I just trust him to hold me in a way that I can begin to care for myself because I know the pieces that are left out will be carried by him until I can carry them all myself. I believe that this trust has grown out of a sense of safety, and a responsivity to my needs by him.

For example, yesterday I was feeling very disconnected and frightened and I placed a call to him. (On some level, when I get so disconnected I feel like he is gone too.) He wasn't able to call back till the end of the day and I had just gone out for a walk, so I missed his call. However, just knowing that he called back was enough for me. It reminded me that he was there, and in that message I was able to know that I was here, too... Today he called again, and a one minute conversation has shored me up tremendously.

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I guess its trusting our gut reactions in any situation rather than putting that power into someone else

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Yes, Mouse, I believe it's about our own power and not other's....trusting ourselves so we can trust others....