I totally get how you feel. Embarrassed, ashamed, heartbroken, needy - just from seeing a picture. A smile. And wishing that smile was for you. But its not. Thats part of whats horrible. Getting caught in the act of wanting. I actually remember the last time i tried to breast feed - it was not well-received! I mean trying as a child, not as the mother. Its kind of the same feeling, only times one thousand, when i google my t.