My T says if you don't 'gel' then the work can't get done. So if you're seeing someone who doesn't feel like they really 'get' you, then find someone else? It's not about the qualifications or experience or anything like that, I think it's about being able to hear and understand each other. For me being deaf, communication is SO important. I ditched our marriage therapist simply because he couldn't understand me and I was sick of repeating myself or having to condense what I really wanted to say in a few short words. He was good with my husband so I hope my husband continues to see him as an individual T. Then one I see hasn't been qualified long, is probably a couple of years younger, but is of my generation, is married, has at least one child, so he understands the pattern of the school year, the the hard work of a marriage, and understands everything I say and I understand everything he says. He also seems very kind and will just there and take it while I'm going on about something. He even did something that shows he trusts me. So he did say that the 'bond' is what gets most of the work done. Don't feel bad if this person isn't a good fit. Keep trying. Out of about 20 people I've seen, only this one and a past T were great. The others were mediocre. One was really bad.