I can so relate to this struggle. Liz's idea helped me as well when it got to the point I could no longer take care of both my parents and grandparents; as hard as it was, assisted living certainly helped and my grandparents were happier there.

I am currently taking care of ailing parents, their home, appointments, and affairs, and working full time besides dealing with my own MH issues and affairs. I have learned to call in for help. I don't have family that lives close but I get help with aides or CNAs to come in sometimes during the week to relieve me and to watch over them so it frees me up so I can do things or to get some rest. Perhaps this might be an alternative. Also, a friend has found other services such as to do to their grocery shopping and errands for them, and advocates to take them to appointments, which buys back some of his time and to relieve him. There might be things like this in your area as well. Meals on wheels and organizations like this can help too, which are really fantastic.

I hope you find some solutions that can help you. I admire what you are doing. Sending you peace, strength, and courage meanwhile. All my best to you and your family. ((((Goldenguru)))))