t, I think I've started grieving the giving up of "us", of the team we've been for 3.5 years, of this deep connection we have. Hubby went to a baseball game last night so he didn't get home until long after I went to bed, so I had the space for it... I lit a little tea light candle last night before I went to bed and looked at the flame and gave myself permission to feel the loss, and I 'talked' to you about it in my head and cried until I fell asleep. I forgot to blow the candle out, so it burned itself out at some point I guess. I'm ready to talk to you this evening now. I'll probably cry some more, but I don't care. It's not like I haven't cried with you before. It's kinda stupid t, I'm the one who instigated ending therapy, I still feel like it's right and it's time and that I'm ready, but I'm feeling the sadness of separation. Big time. I know I'll be fine, but right now, it hurts. A bunch. Teach me how to do this. Okay?