I am so sick tonight. First night I've been left alone, I wish it had happened sooner and I d not been left on a night we knew I'd be triggered by therapy today. Did the right things when I started planning Sui again ... Took the Zyprexa and rang the crisis line but the phone cut out in the weather so I'm hoping they haven't called the police on me again. Waiting for the meds to kick in but I think I'm too sick physically from anxiety probably to sleep, i need to get up in 6 hours. It's nice to finally be alone so I can be the real me instead of having to fake everything but it's anboying to cry so much and I really do feel so sick. Just need some sleep I guess