I try to be happy.

I eat well. I take vitamins. I take meds. I workout.

Yet- I always feel sad inside.

Life feels sort of hopeless and dull.

I got a job but it's made life become more dull and hopeless in a sick twisted sense. Is this all there is. I just don't see much of a reason to live long. Yet I am still here. I am lost inside. Sort of wandering with no real place for me. Making very little money and I guess after awhile that saying money doesn't buy happiness starts to make sense. I can't buy my happiness. Maybe for a short while but eh. I don't think anything would make me happy. It's like I start to become distant from everything.

All my desires.

A piece at a time, I remove my shallow joys from life, until nothing is left.