Thanks, it's okay. I feel worse for you because yours is so much worse than me, we have only been together 7 years, and my kid is just mine. We're adults about it and we are mutually seperating, and staying friends. You though, have a child to think about, and you are right, it's not right to put him/her through all this. It's all about the kid now. We matter, but really don't, till they become teens. Do what's best for the child, not ourselves hun.