This article describes exactly what I experienced as a kid. Sounds like one of your parents may have been a Narcissist too.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...their-children
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The real tragedy occurs behind closed doors at home, much like the process of physical abuse. The problem with being a child of a narcissist is that it takes these children so many years of frustration and anguish to figure out that Mom or Dad isn’t quite right; until that point, these children are merely dancing as fast as they can, trying to please the impossible-to-please narcissistic parent. It takes years to finally see that the type of parenting they’ve been receiving is wrong – if not emotionally abusive.
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Because young kids can’t make accurate sense of the narcissist’s interpersonal tricks and stunts, these children internalize intense shame (‘I keep failing my Mom’) which leads to anger that the child turns on himself (‘I’m so stupid,’ ‘Something’s wrong with me’).
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The child of the narcissist must cater to and keep their partner happy, even when that involves squashing her own needs and feelings.
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