How life/mood changing will this be?

Will I gain a LOT of weight? I will miss my cheekbones!

Will I be fit to continue to work? I'm self employed.

How will I finction on the medication?

Will I become a zombie, like I was on Mirtazapine?

I'm shell shocked but still feeling very positive. I'm dreading going to the dark side with this.

I've alienated most people with my manic behaviour over the years, to the point where I have zero support network. I have my parents and my brother, but who can truly be honest with their close family?! I can't talk about my sexual urges and practices with them, they'd be horrified. They know a lot of my problems, but I hide a lot. I'm so ashamed.

I hate it that I've pushed so many good people away in the past, I really do feel pretty alone right now with this. I'm not down, just a little sad at what I've become and where I am.

I guess I'm struggling to come to terms with this.

T.