she just doesn't get it.... my mom just stopped by my house and told me "your house is looking a little messy." Well, mom I'm sorry if my mental state right now won't let clean top to bottom, inside-out... up to YOUR standards of clean (she likes a spotless house that looks like no one lives there). I am sorry if I only slept for like a hour last night because you didn't pick up my meds like you said would and I hadn't had them in like a week because you didn't take me to get them refilled! You just don't realize what going without meds does to me. Hell, you think I lie to doctors and think I'm probably on meds that I shouldn't be on, because I "make up" illnesses.

I'm sorry if all I wanna do is crawl back in bed and cry until I pass out and then sleep all day, but that's part of depression, ya know? Oh wait, you dont know because you refuse to admit that I have depression or anything else. Oh yeah, and while I'm at it, I'm sorry that all I can think about now is how I have once again disappointed you by not cleaning! I'm sorry that I am a disappointment as a daughter and a failure as a human. I want so bad for you to understand that I am not "just being lazy" and how physically and mentally hard it is for me to focus on CLEANING when I feel like this. But you will never understand because you refuse to TRY to understand and accept it. You just dismiss it as laziness!

And you wonder why I never talk to you about what is going on in my life......