Well, for one, pot and alcohol are not conducive to maintaining an erection. Second, you guys have a dynamic that's out of balance and it sounds like you're feeling emasculated. Throw in what sounds like some performance anxiety and you're in a very tough position.

So that said, I would suggest putting down the pot and alcohol, get some couples counseling and have some constructive conversions out of the bedroom concerning your feelings about all of this.

One thing you might also check, being 37 your testosterone levels are dropping. It might be worth a checkup at your doctor and have them check your testosterone levels. If something's out of whack (hehe, just saw what I wrote), then they can help get your levels to normal. If they're normal for your age, you might also try something like Nugenix ... a natural testosterone booster that uses Fenugreek Extract.

Good luck and hang in there.