I have never seen someone who claims to be a strong independent woman not stand up to the crap that this H is handing out either.....I would be fighting back & I wouldn't take the crap that he's blaming her for without throwing blame back in his face........so what if there is a huge blow up.....at least it would get the end of the marriage started. I would have so much steam built up by this time he would be lucky I wouldn't blow out all the windows on the house....I wouldn't tolerate being treated the way he's treating you without really letting him have it.

My H started off our marriage with putting me down sarcasm.....I didn't have a lot of self-confidence at that time but I definitely knew how to stand up for myself.....to start with I started handing it back then hated the way that made me feel so I drew the line & told him if he didn't stop, the locks would be changed & he would no longer be welcome & I would end the marriage right then. He agreed to change though it took a year of continuous reminding.....but I did see his attempt to change & he would catch himself many times......he had other serious issues that I had with him from even before the marriage that ended up being the final straws that ended the marriage....& stupidly I hid away from the serious problems of the marriage getting my degree, then in my computer engineering career. I fought with him constantly though not willing to tolerate it silently. Wasn't until I my career ended due to aerospace engineering collapse in California in 1994 & not being able to find a job....depression set in......more because I had no place to escape the marriage & for the next 13 years it went down hill until I was seeing red before I finally left.....don't waste time in a bad marriage as you never know when there might be something that financially ends up trapping you in it with no way out......I got out when my mother died & I sold her house & took my inheritance & split...not giving him a cent......left him to deal with the mess he made of our life due to his incompetence......sadly it wasn't until last year I came to realize that his major problems with his inability to function is due to Asperger's.....at the age of 62....never Dx'ed & in denial that there was anything wrong with himself....that he was the one perfectly fine & I was the one with the problems & not willing to tolerate him.