I always have a lot in my mind. My racing thoughts are pretty constant. I never know silence.

Like, I feel like my thoughts push me. I think it's some sort of combination with pressured speech and the racing thoughts. My mind leaps fast from one thing to the next thing. But it's usually about stuff that has been hurtful to me and people acting ignorant about it.

For example, if people say things like "you need this, it's easy to get it." But it's not easy. It's easy for them because maybe they have a good job or a different situation, but for me it's something I work really hard for and still can't get what I need. That's when it comes out. And then they say things like "that's an excuse." And it makes me blow up. That's an example. It could be about anything, but the same type of situation.

But, I used to be able to bite back and just keep quiet and know that other people don't understand and won't try. But now, I still understand that, but I have this driving force to try to make them see from someone else's point of view... and the urge is much stronger and I feel my will power isn't as strong any more.