I guess the issue is whether you mean feeling love or demonstrating love. For me, I have no choice in how I feel about someone. Love, affection, indifference, dislike...I don't get to pick what emotion I feel toward another person.

Now I do have some choice about how I act toward another person. I can show love to someone that I might not particularly care for, or choose not to show feelings of love toward someone when it might be inappropriate. But even in this, I think that I am not completely able to choose what emotions I demonstrate. If my feelings toward someone are strong, they always leak out. So if I am madly in love with someone, or if I strongly dislike someone, eventually it is going to show. This can be a big problem in cases where I have to get along with someone I dislike, such as with my former boss. There was no way for me to convince him that I liked him, because I can't hide my feelings very well. Fortunately, I almost never really dislike someone.

I do think some people have more choice over how they show their feelings, but this is how it is for me.

Jo