It's typically how it begins, however. The intensity, for me, felt good after what led me to that point. I had insecurity when I met my exh. Not just in romance, but with how life was(or wasn't) turning out. I was also in grief, probably ptsd features, developing or already had a neurological illness, I wasn't well, physically, emotionally nor even spiritually.

I used to believe that I truly triggered the intensity of his emotions, how could anyone be that upset otherwise, right?

It is more than just learning what you don't want, but in learning your true inner self/identity because there's a risk that next time could be much worse.

There's an older book out there, Men Who Hate Women and the Women that Love Them. Books like these, open keyholes to doors that broaden self view. If you do get a chance, it's not a bad read.

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