I finally slept last night and through today. I still feel awful and hope I sleep again tonight but at least I'm not running on 1 hour anymore. I have to get ready and to get the liquid valium that hopefully is going to help me actually sleep consistently and I really don't feel like going out but I know it will be hard to sleep tonight because I crashed so hard last night that the mania is just waiting to take back over (right now the depression is much stronger). My family dr confirmed that I feel terrible because I need rest but of course he has no way to get me that rest.

Tonight's big step is probably going to be taking the liquid valium, which I understand tastes terrible. I know pharmacies could flavor liquid meds a few years ago but I don't know that my current one does. I guess I'll find out.

Thank you all for the support. I really needed that.