So you are waiting for him to give you permission to end this connection. That's a real bad habit to get into. You'ld be very smart to break that habit now . . . I mean kill it. Otherwise, all your life, in one way or another, you will be constrained by what you think others will allow you to do.

You have a false sense of owing other people something. You're even starting to feel responsible for this guy's pain, "What if he has no one else interested in him, and now I dump him, and he feels bad over that . . . ?" He knows this about you, and he's working it. It's not for you to sit there figuring out what he is thinking. Figure out that, if you don't want to stay in touch with him, you don't have to. This is not a friendship. This is a creepy man who you wish you hadn't gotten involved with, so you are trying to figure out how you can justify abandoning the connection. You don't have to justify anything to him. If he was a nice, charming guy, you wouldn't be all torn up like this. He's not. You're sick of him . . . and rightly so. Do not see yourself as some kind of a savior to him. We all have to save ourselves. If I understand right, he has your phone number. Doesn't that mean he can possibly trace your address? You better consider how dangerous this is.

When a man who has never met you will manipulate your guilt feelings into getting you to let him keep in contact with you, that is a predator. He's not even available when you need someone, as you said. He'll ignore your texts and messages when he has something better to do. (It's not because he's always so busy.) He's all take and no give. Yes, he'll listen to you to learn whatever he can use to know how to manipulate you. That's sick.

You've figured out that "not many people are interested in dating him." Good for you. You're catching on. And it's not because he's some sweet, shy guy who just needs an understanding girl to help him come out of his lonesome little shell. Stop telling yourself dopey stuff like that. He's on-line trying to track down a girl to meet in a motel room because "in real life" he's scaring away women who can see how creepy he is in person.

Yes, making positive changes is hard, regardless of who you are living with. Be glad that you have a roof over your head. Mental illness has caused some people to wind up homeless. Be glad that you are not in the street somewhere trying to make positive changes. There will always be something in your life that isn't quite right. Think of something that you were going to start doing when the summer comes, and decide to start it now.