I'm afraid of opening up to people and coming to care a lot about them, and then having them reject me, find somebody else they like better and abandon me, take advantage of me. or betray my trust. I've also had friends misunderstand my intentions or impute bad motives to me that just weren't there.

I've had a lot of bad experiences over the years with friends where I felt that I truly cared about them and tried to be a good loving friend, but ended up being treated badly. I've had some really good friends too. But it's the few very bad ones that have been so traumatic and hurtful that I'm almost phobic now of getting close to anybody. I don't know why, but it seems like people have a hard time understanding who I am inside.